Friday, September 14, 2012

The Thing About Perfect

Sarah is right.  Perfect is over rated.  Still, we do see a lot of women get frozen by this idea.  I wish I could say it only happens in response to work, but we are exceptional if nothing else at striving for perfection in all things.  Sure, I'll just go ahead and have a baby, breast feed, run a marathon, lose all the weight, go back to work, go vegan, have a killer sex life, take snowboarding lessons, and win America's Next Top Model all in the same year.  It sounds crazy when you write it all down at once, but sometimes many of us are guilty of the be all that you can be and more obsession.

So what's the deal with perfect and why do we convince ourselves that all will be well when this magical thing called perfection happens?  Okay, it's about to get real.  I'm sending out a warning that when I drop these two bits of science, people generally don't like it.  Are you sitting down?  Okay, here we go...

First perfection is an illusion.  It exists in your mind and maybe in math.  When it comes to work especially, there is something magical about holding onto an idea and never letting it out in the world.  No matter how amazing and talented we are at whatever we do, we can NEVER 100% re-create what our imagination puts forth.  It's just not possible.  What we are forced to settle for is a second best, and usually that is incredible in it's own right.  With each creation and idea there is an immediate loss and mourning that occurs because while it will come close in manifestation to what we see in our mind, it will never match the magic 100%. This usually gets people a little disappointed.  I however, see it as a wonderful opportunity.  This is where all the potential happens, ideas change, become better, fail and then succeed. The minute an idea enters the world it is open to possibility, collaboration, and multiple expressions.  This is when you can communicate with the medium, ebb and flow, have a conversation and really make something.  Disappointing?  No, I call it filled with possibility.

I started you off with the easy one.  Here's the one that is hard to swallow.  Just how cool are you with your own success? Sure you might think you are, but in my experience many of us are scared to death of what will happen if we get what we want.  We sit on ideas that might be brilliant, hold back from letting something out in to the world out of fear that it is not perfect because we are terrified that if it turns out to be and we get everything we want, then what? What if we think we don't deserve it? What if we were told we don't deserve it? What if we don't know what to do with ourselves if we surpass those around us in success, money, happiness?  This is real, people and a lot of us are there even if we don't think we are.

Well, then what? Take a deep breath for one.  Know you are not alone. Add this to the long and wonderful list of complicated things that make humans so damn interesting. This is a part of you.  Know it, accept it as such, expect it, say it out loud a million times when you feel it and move onward and upward regardless.  Sure it's scary.  Life is pretty scary.  Life is also pretty wonderful, despite being imperfect in so many, many ways.  The key is knowing that nothing can happen at all if you wait for perfection and never put things out there.  Trust me, when you do get what you want, you can worry about it then.  For now, put yourself out there.  Share your ideas as imperfect as they might be.  Life waits for no one.  Worry about the rest later. Be brave.  The time is now.

Happy Friday



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